Archive for September, 2009

Things that go bump in the night

Posted in family, random bits on September 28, 2009 by twotwoeight

Burglar on the roof

They were both soundly asleep when the Wife was woken up by a repetitive thumping noise which seemed to be coming from the roof.  Ridden with fear, she turned and woke the Husband up.  The Husband stirred, and guess what was his response?

A. Turns to the Wife and said, “You wait here, I will go check it out”

B. Pulls the covers over his head and pretends to be asleep

C. Pretends to be afflicted with selective hearing loss and claims he hears nothing

D. Calls the cops in case there is a burglar

E. None of the above

Answer? E. None of the above.

cat meowing

He starts making loud “meow-ing” sounds hoping to scare away the rats which were the presumed culprits of the thumping noises. Go figure! 😉

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Dear Ben Sheep,

Posted in family on September 25, 2009 by twotwoeight

I heard about the adventures you had been having lately.  First was the kidnapping by the hired help where you had to spend a few hours cooped up with Kamotz (who by the way must thank his lucky stars you were kidnapped too or else his disapearance may have gone unnoticed for days).  And then, there was the brief internship at the altar to enhance your spiritual beliefs.  I do so hope you did not catch on fire…or got rained on by joss stick ashes or candle wax.  I hope you have emerged a stronger and wiser sheep.  Life must be so exciting.

the maestro

My life is pretty exciting too.  As you can see, I am trying to cultivate the musical genius within me by secretly learning to play the gu zheng when no one is around.  Unfortunately, my hands are not quite long enough…and I have yet to find a solution for this.  I hope to see you soon, in the pink of health (though any shade of pink is definitely pinker in comparison to Mumra)!

With lots of love and wool,

Xiu Hak.

Stupidity plus ignorance is a bad combination

Posted in doctoring tales on September 22, 2009 by twotwoeight

I thought the words “Isolation Ward” were pretty self-explanatory.  Apparently I was wrong.  With the festive season upon us now, tons of visitors have been storming our ward, even though it has been clearly stated that our ward is currently the isolation ward for H1N1 patients.  Okay.  Visitors I can still accept.  But an insurance agent?

I had just finished attending to two 3 year olds admitted at the same time for severe asthma in the acute cubicle when I saw this strange man standing there without a facemask with a thick file.

Me : Can I help you?

Bozo : Hi doctor, I’m from X insurance company and…

Me : Do you know this is a H1N1 isolation ward?

Bozo : Is it? So doctor, have you heard about the latest…

Me : DO YOU KNOW THIS IS A H1N1 ISOLATION WARD?

Bozo : Ohh…is it? I didn’t know.  There are no signs.

Me : You didn’t see the signs at the entrance???

Bozo : NO! What signs? There are no signs.

Me : The huge brightly coloured signs stuck at our ward entrance in 3 different languages. You must be able to understand one of the languages, right? Let me walk you to the front entrance and read them to you now.

After I read the Malay and English signs out loud to him and told him I would read the Chinese one if I could but I can’t, he gave a sheepish smile and left.

snellen chart

Perhaps we should have his eyes checked.  Or maybe he really can’t read? 😉

Take my hand…

Posted in kindred spirits, the box of chocolates known as life on September 21, 2009 by twotwoeight

“Little pieces of you get chipped away by another person and you shave pieces of yourself away to fit another person.  And one day, you look up and you don’t even know who you are.” – Anna, Grey’s Anatomy

Was watching Grey’s Anatomy and this reminded me of a friend’s predicament.  How do you help someone who does not want to be helped?

the elusive villain

Posted in doctoring tales, random bits on September 19, 2009 by twotwoeight

My jaw nearly dropped when I went to a H1N1 mortality meeting and the chairperson of the meeting was a dead-ringer for this villain!!!!

Sun Jian Kui - the eunuch villain

I was painstakingly trying to describe to pw who I was talking about but failed.  Luckily, after some digging around, I managed to find a picture of him.

I wonder if any of the other people in the room were having the same thoughts as I was, but I guess not, since no one else was stealing glances at him! 😉

Little Bit’s virtual alter ego

Posted in random bits on September 13, 2009 by twotwoeight

[clearspring_widget title=”Hamster” wid=”4921d1bbde64b665″ pid=”4aabd51a47f74c5b” width=”280″ height=”210″ domain=”widgets.clearspring.com”]

Move your mouse around him real quick and be prepared to be entertained!! Or you can click on him and feed him some neon-green hamster food!! 🙂

the evil crustacean

Posted in gastronomical delights, random bits on September 13, 2009 by twotwoeight

Meet the most evil Snow Crab I have ever seen…

evil crustacean

He’d be perfect as a villain in The Little Mermaid.  I can just imagine the face-off between him and Sebastian.